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#1 26-02-12 11:23:54

Zipper
Verified Member
From: Darwin, Northern Territory Aus
Registered: 20-08-04
Posts: 2,690
Website

FOR SALE ...

... AUSTRALIAN POLITICIANS from all levels of government (they are embarrassing me).

Currently the bitter hate-filled stoush between Prime Minister Jul-liar Gillard, and deposed egotistic ex-PM "it's all about MOI" Kevin Rudd, is in international news and making us look like fools.

Darwin & Palmerston are about to have council elections - boy what a choice we have!
A few years back a Darwin Mayor was convicted of theft, stealing ratepayer money to buy a fridge for his office, a voice-altering Darth Vader mask, and sexy underwear for his girlfriend. He seemed unrepentant too.

His replacement has been convicted of firearms offences (keeping an unregistered firearms on his premises) and his daughter was made to do 50 hours community services for cruelty to animals. She sauntered into court wearing a slutty outfit that left little to the imagination.

The popular Palmerston Mayor (a feisty Scot) was recently convicted of aggravated assault after attacking neighbours with a golf club after a dispute over their 5 dogs being allowed to wander loose (they got into the mayor's yard). He was also put on the Banned Drinkers Register meaning he cannot buy takeaway alcohol from a pub or bottle-shop. (Loose dogs are a huge problem in Palmerston which has more than its fair share of resident rednecks & bogans http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bogan ).

Darwin Councillors are roundly hated by businessmen in the Central Business District for driving customers away with stupid parking regulations (the councillor's reaction is to call the businessmen a mob of idiot whingers).
The council also voted to not have a Santa Claus in the mall last year.
2 years ago the Moscow Circus came to Darwin and instead paying rent for use of the show grounds, the circus offered the councillors free tickets instead. The councillors snapped the offer up (robbing Darwin ratepayers of rent money) and treated themselves & friends to free circus performances.
The local paper printed front-page portraits of offending councillors wearing PhotoShopped red clown noses.

So, I have a whole bunch of idiots for sale - only 10p each and red noses thrown in for free.

Last edited by Zipper (26-02-12 21:11:00)


Zipper ("G'Day Mate!")
I'm not 65! I'm only $59.95+tax
www.drivingnt.com

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26-02-12 11:23:54

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Re: FOR SALE ...



#2 26-02-12 15:03:55

WillyO
Member
Registered: 12-11-10
Posts: 205

Re: FOR SALE ...

Blimey Zipper, when I saw Santa's name appear I couldn't wait to read on I was wondering what the Aussies had him on maybe burglary ! Willy.  lol


A wise man does not need advice, But, only a fool won't take it.   Miam, DIAmond Advanced Test, DIAmond Special Test.

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#3 26-02-12 17:24:49

MAZ
Verified Member
From: N/Wales, Cheshire
Registered: 13-06-06
Posts: 838

Re: FOR SALE ...

You are not on your own Zipper, we are just recovering form a major scandal where Mp’s where making expence claims for all sorts of things like second homes that they did not own, tv’s, holidays, garden furniture and even a blue movie rental.

Latest waste of taxpayers money which has just come to light, is the cost of renting 12 trees since 2001 which has cost us £400,000. http://www.thisislondon.co.uk/standard/ … -bercow.do

Also in the last couple of days an MP charged by the police after a bar room brawl in the House of Commons Bar: http://www.politics.co.uk/news/2012/02/ … mons-brawl

Long gone are the days of Winston Churchill here.

Maz.

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#4 26-02-12 21:45:44

Zipper
Verified Member
From: Darwin, Northern Territory Aus
Registered: 20-08-04
Posts: 2,690
Website

Re: FOR SALE ...

£400,000 to rent trees!

Some years ago, a Northern Territory government minister took more than usual umbrage at the probing questions posed by TV reporters.
He grabbed a reporter's microphone cord and wrapped it round his (the reporter's) neck in front of cameras http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Max_Ortmann.

One good thing about the relaxed way of life down here is that politicians are accessible to humble members of the public.
Last night I stood behind "Hendo" at a supermarket checkout line. Paul Henderson is the Northern Territory's Chief Minister, our "noble leader" or "Hendo" for short.
I was wondering whether to tap him on the shoulder and discuss the government's failings in the driver training industry then decided against it ...
(1) He is much taller than me and tapping his buttocks instead of shoulders might not get quite the response I was hoping for, and (2) being much bigger than me, he might get offended by my line of conversation and stuff me into the vegetable display.


Zipper ("G'Day Mate!")
I'm not 65! I'm only $59.95+tax
www.drivingnt.com

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#5 28-02-12 11:20:35

Zipper
Verified Member
From: Darwin, Northern Territory Aus
Registered: 20-08-04
Posts: 2,690
Website

Re: FOR SALE ...

Today's headlines: ANOTHER MAYOR JAILED!
The Palmerston ex-Mayor (he resigned) was sentenced to 10 day's jail for "aggravated assault".

He is standing for re-election at the end of this month and has a good chance of being Mayor again.
He has a lot of sympathy from the public because he was driven to point of madness when 5 dogs (it's illegal to have 5 dogs in one house at Palmerston) invaded his yard and the owners gave him a lot of cheek.

I'm in a different city so when I vote this month, my choice of Mayor narrows down to two newcomers:
A lady from Darwin's large, highly-respected Chinese community - and a homeless guy from Darwin's large "long-grass" community.

The long-grasser (homeless or itinerant person living in the grass on the fringe of society) is very famous, he's known as Trevor the Rubbish Warrior.
Trevor spends his waking hours roaming the city and suburbs collecting rubbish, dead branches etc and putting it in piles on the footpath for the council to collect.
He is very diligent (says that God told him to do it) and you see his neat piles all over the place.
Lately he has taken to wearing hats made from newspapers or shopping bags, and he now turns his rubbish piles into "sculptures" with artfully placed branches, drink cans etc.
It looks like Trevor's mind might be deteriorating a little (he's an intelligent educated man) but I think he has a chance of being elected.
He says that if he's elected he'll sleep in the Mayor's office (why not?) and will advocate setting up a bar for long-grassers to drink out of the public eye.


Zipper ("G'Day Mate!")
I'm not 65! I'm only $59.95+tax
www.drivingnt.com

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