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#1 27-05-08 10:10:15

EKAL
Verified Member
From: East Kilbride
Registered: 23-04-06
Posts: 1,050
Website

JOKEs

Removed due to complaints about it's content.

Giz


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27-05-08 10:10:15

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Re: JOKEs



#2 27-05-08 10:11:24

EKAL
Verified Member
From: East Kilbride
Registered: 23-04-06
Posts: 1,050
Website

Re: JOKEs

Losing Your Load

As a trucker in Essex stops for a red light, a blonde pulls up behind him. She jumps out of her car, runs up to his truck, and knocks on the door. The trucker lowers the window, and she says: "Hi, my name is Heather and you are losing some of your load."

The trucker ignores her and proceeds down the street. When the truck stops for another red light, the girl again catches up. She jumps out of her car, runs up and knocks on the door. Again, the trucker lowers the window. As if they've never spoken before, the blonde says brightly: "Hi, my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load!"

Shaking his head, the trucker ignores her again and continues down the street. At the third red light, the same thing happens again. All out of breath, the blonde gets out of her car, runs up, knocks on the truck door. The trucker lowers the window. Again she says: "Hi, my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load!"

When the light turns green, the trucker revs up and races to the next light. When he stops this time, he jumps out of his truck, and runs back to the blonde. He knocks on her window, and as she lowers it, he says... "Hi, my name is Kevin and I'm driving a fcuking gritter, you dumb $$//@!!!"


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#3 27-05-08 15:58:05

DampDog
Verified Member
From: Staffordshire.
Registered: 04-02-06
Posts: 1,538

Re: JOKEs

A man got a job as a zookeeper, on his first day at the zoo he was walking past the aviary when he saw a beautiful finch. He reached into the cage and caught the bird to give it a stroke. Unfortunately he squeezed too hard and killed the bird.In a panic he threw the dead bird into the lions cage to get rid of the evidence.

Walking away he accidentally knocked over the Bee hive exhibit. The hive crashed to the ground and the bees began to swarm out. In a panic he stomped all over the hive and killed the bees then threw the lot over the wall into the lions cage.

As he walked past the Monkey cage he turned to see all the monkeys taking the Mickey out of him. He flew into a rage and entered the monkey cage and punched the first monkey he saw, killing him outright. In a panic now he also threw the monkey's body over into the lions cage.

The next day the zoo introduced a new lion to the lion enclosure. The lion walked up to the leader of the pack an old and wise lion and said "Hi mate, I'm new, just got here from Africa, what's this place like then?"

"It's all right here mate" said the old lion. "What's the food like then?" said the newcomer.
"Not too bad" said the old lion "Last night I had finch, chimps and mushy bees!"


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#4 27-05-08 17:18:04

VandADI
Administrator
From: Coulsdon, Surrey
Registered: 29-02-04
Posts: 7,597

Re: JOKEs

Hi all,
I like a good joke as well as the the next person and don't wish to appear to be a party pooper, but when posting jokes in this section, could you please make sure that the content posted is not offensive, just to remind all that this is an "open" forum and as such is viewable to members of the public of all ages.  wink  smile
Thanks.  smile

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#5 27-05-08 17:24:08

DampDog
Verified Member
From: Staffordshire.
Registered: 04-02-06
Posts: 1,538

Re: JOKEs

Oops..

If I've offended any Lions, chimps, finches or bees, please accept my humble apologies... sad


ADI (car)
1st CT (5)

I used to be a compleat idiot, until some bits fell off...

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#6 27-05-08 22:43:24

EKAL
Verified Member
From: East Kilbride
Registered: 23-04-06
Posts: 1,050
Website

Re: JOKEs

Removed due to complaints about it's content.

Giz

SURLEY JOKING...............AINT YA?


I find it hard to believe anyone would complain about the content of the Joke I posted unless they are totally "prude" OR well under the age to drive.
this forum is about driving, yes there are threads that have other content BUT anyone visiting THIS site will probably be over 17, and I don't think the content of the 2 jokes I posted was below that age range.

Anyway delete all you want, ain't a big deal, was just wanting to share fun.

P.S - can we post the "slightly riskay" jokes on the private section?


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#7 27-05-08 22:59:17

EKAL
Verified Member
From: East Kilbride
Registered: 23-04-06
Posts: 1,050
Website

Re: JOKEs

caught the bird to give it a stroke.

I want to complain about the content of this joke, I am totally embarrassed to repeat this section to my next door neighbours 2 year old child :evil: :evil: :evil: tongue :angel:


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#8 28-05-08 09:26:17

VandADI
Administrator
From: Coulsdon, Surrey
Registered: 29-02-04
Posts: 7,597

Re: JOKEs

Hi Ekal,
You will be surprised how many members remain logged in to their accounts whilst away leaving children under 17 free to roam the boards, including their pm's  wink
I have checked the trash and noticed that a few of your "jokes" were sexually orientated, the forum rules does not permit this hence the reason for their deletions,I do hope that you will understand (especially as it is half term and kids are at home free to go on mums/dads computers wink)

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