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#1 06-10-04 13:25:10

pixie
Guest

fed up

hi
very fed up learner driver here.
i've a lesson later on today and I'm dreading it, my instructor has turned really cheeky and very patronizing over the past month or so.
i've been doing a lesson once a week for nearly 10 months now, and at this stage i think he is taking advtantage of me.
no, im not a perfect driver, but I'm not the worlds worse either, i actually feel im doing really good. he's forever telling me what to do and how to do it just as i am about to do things. ive said to him twice before to let me just turn on the inicator and to check the mirror myself, and he said he's only trying to help. he has actually stripped me of some of my confidence  :cry:
i've done reversing around the corner 4 times, parallel park twice and 3 point turn three times....i think i should be spending less time just driving around and concentrate on my manouvers for a while? he hasn't even introduced me to the emergency stop yet. im really fed up now and just feel like he is taking me for a ride at this stage.
after todays lesson im going to tell him that i no longer wish to go out with him and i want to take a break for a few weeks from driving altogether, but when i do regain my confidence to go back out on the road that i WONT be going out with him.
it just got too much a few weeks ago when a girl who started 2 months after me passed her test (she is out with him also) and i enquired would I be ready for my test around christmas? he just stared at me and very rudely said no. i asked for an explanation and he said we have to take these things one stage at a time. sad

why did he treat me like this?

pixie

06-10-04 13:25:10

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Re: fed up




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#2 06-10-04 19:01:27

jgarbutt
Verified Member
From: Driving Instructor in Horsham,
Registered: 26-04-04
Posts: 380
Website

Re: fed up

Hi pixie,

try not to be disheartened, but it does sound like you could do with a new instructor. An instructor certainly shouldn't be patronising, and they should be giving you a chance to do things youself.

There is something called 'transfer of responsibility' where the pupil starts doing things themselves without being prompted, doesn't sound like this is happening. You also mentioned just driving around - are you getting feedback, constructive criticism and help on improving your driving, whilst this is going on?

Also, if he doesn't think you'll be ready he should give you an explanation.

Everybody learns at different rates, so don't compare yourself to others. But do look for another instructor, try and get recommendations if possible, and ask for an assesment - then you'll get a picture of where you are at. If you can't find a recommendation, try www.learners.me.uk

Hope that helps, and ask again if you need more info.


Jason Garbutt
DSA Approved Driving Instructor
GDlogom.gif
[color=blue]      Driving lessons throughout Sussex
Tel. 01403 251662 - www.GreatDriver.co.uk

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#3 06-10-04 19:53:57

pixie
Guest

Re: fed up

hi
thanks for the reply.
my lesson went very well today surprisingly enough, and my instructor was actually very positive and encouraging. so i thought it was fair to maybe give him another few weeks just to see. although i was dead cert today that i'd had enough, LOL, he actually proved me wrong.

i did phone a recommended driving instructor but he is book up until christmas so it's kinda left me where i have 2 options-keep going out with my current instructor and grin and bear it for a while, or just stop driving altogether until the other instructor becomes free....although i really dont want to stop driving!

again thanks for your reply
pixie smile

#4 06-10-04 22:20:17

Anonymous
Guest

Re: fed up

not always good pratice to change instructors but if your not happy then change but you could have problems with a new adi i personaly dont like taking other adis pupils on it can be dificult and it takes a few lessons to ge to know each other


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#5 07-10-04 01:08:58

Approved Instructor
Verified Member
From: Blackburn, Preston, Lancashire
Registered: 16-03-04
Posts: 884
Website

Re: fed up

Hi Pixie

At the end of the day you are paying for your driving lesson, if you are not happy with what you are getting for your money then change instructor.

Just to pick up on one or 2 things in your post if i may.

You say ; ''Ive said to him twice before to let me just turn on the indicator and to check the mirror myself''

It may just be a typing error ? but you should check your mirrors Before you signal.

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#6 07-10-04 07:44:48

Midge
Member
From: Nottingham
Registered: 25-02-04
Posts: 414
Website

Re: fed up

I don't know how other instructors teach, but another thing I noticed on your message
" I've done reversing round a corner 4 times and the parallel park  and three point turn three times each."   I woudn't wait until my pupil was perfect on one  thing before moving on to the next, but I certainly would need to know that they were fairly confident on each manouvre before teaching the next,  and 3 or 4 times each isn't nearly enough.   My pupils would start getting mixed up if I taught them too close together.
Do you notice if he is "helping you out" by using the dual controls?   I have had pupils who suddenly realized, with a previous instructor, that when they had a "good" lesson, he was using the duals,  but you learn by your mistakes, so a "bad" lesson isn't always a bad thing.
Midge


Midge  -   Dip D.I.

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#7 07-10-04 11:21:44

paul1
Guest

Re: fed up

Perhaps it might be a good idea to actually discuss your concerns WITH your instructor and not everybody on this forum. I make it clear from time to time with my pupils that if there is any difficulty they feel they are having with any aspect of their lessons the first person to talk to is me, NOT their friends or other instructors or anyone else for that matter. It's a matter of being "approachable". If you feel you cannot talk to your instructor about your concerns, then, and only then, is it time to part company.

Paul1.

#8 07-10-04 11:22:32

pixie
Guest

Re: fed up

no approved instructor, you just read it wrong.
they were seperate examples, i wasn't chatting about the rule of checking mirror and then signalling, i meant two seperate examples of i just wish i could turn on my indicator and another example of checking my mirror whenever i feel the need......
should have made myself more clearer but i definately know after almost 10 months to check my mirror before signalling LOL

pixie

#9 07-10-04 11:24:50

pixie
Guest

Re: fed up

paul this forum is for anyone with concerns and to give and receive advice. if i feel i wish to air my own concerns i will do....wether on a forum or not

pixie

#10 07-10-04 11:28:03

paul1
Guest

Re: fed up

You've missed the point pixie.

I mean't you should talk to your instructor first.

Paul1.

#11 07-10-04 11:32:54

pixie
Guest

Re: fed up

yes i agree, which i have done.
yesterday he showed a totally different side to himself. it still could work out, then again it may not work out, and in a few weeks i may have these feelings once again.
thanks for the advie, but i am giving him another 4-6 weeks, see how things go. and, next lesson (like yesterdays lesson) we may well have another long chat about what i expect from him and what he expects from me. we'll see how it goes.

pixie

#12 07-10-04 11:37:19

paul1
Guest

Re: fed up

That's it Pixie, you keep doing that, after all you're probably paying him around £20 per hour for professional instruction so you should have a say in your learning too.

I wish you good luck for your test and lots of years of safe happy driving.

Paul1.

#13 07-10-04 15:58:14

Anonymous
Guest

Re: fed up

yes pixie best of luck

#14 07-10-04 16:00:15

Anonymous
Guest

Re: fed up

why dont you ask your instructor to come on this forum and give his side of the story

#15 07-10-04 18:47:45

tiger
Guest

Re: fed up

hi there
i've been searching for a learner driver forum for ages, i'm so glad I've come across one at long last  lol

aww pixie i wouldn't get disheartened too much. some people are out on the roads for many many months. i myself have been out for nearly 8 months. it is a bit of a long drawn out process and sometimes i get disheartened but i love driving and can't wait to hopefully pass my test soon.
my instructor is quite firm but he's quite nice aswell. I am a very nervous driver but my confidence is gradually building up. I wouldn't want to do my test until my confidence is 200%.

if your instructor is patronizing leave him, nohing worse than someone who irritates u and makes u feel like a bad driver.

good luck with whatever u decide


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#16 08-10-04 06:06:34

Robbie
Verified Member
From: Shrewsbury
Registered: 29-02-04
Posts: 1,230
Website

Re: fed up

Hi pixie,
at the end of day you do what you feel happy with, and it might just be an idea to mention something to instructor, as i would rather my pupils tell me they arent happy, rather than just walk away.

I'm not having a go at you, and am on your side, just some friendly advice from a friendly instructor!

Good luck in what ever you choose to do.

robbie

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